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To add insult to injury, he’d be welcomed with polite greetings.

If I was driving into some hotels, I would be stopped at the entrance and questioned at length.

In the end she said ‘He seems like a good guy and he does not have blue eyes’.

kenya dating friendship and married-70

But if my white man was by my side, it was all “Yes, sir,” ‘Welcome, sir.” I have never ceased to feel embarrassed by these behaviours.

A mix of resentfulness and reverence, wrapped together in a twisted knot.

“You think you are the first, we have seen many.” To some of the people I passed on the street, a white man was like an ATM machine and he owed them some because he had one of “their women.” In some pubs, we were directed to a spot at the back, away from the people making sneering faces as we passed.

We began to notice the “sinners’ corner” which was reserved for mixed couples.

A friend advised me about the dangers of marrying white men because of their controlling ways and high divorce rates.

The majority wished us well and when we did finally announce our intentions, I had four different hen-night parties organised for me by various friends.The waiters would ask my husband what it was that I was going to eat. I was invisible to them; he had to keep telling them to ask me what I wanted.Unfortunately, I am not quick with words in a face-to-face confrontation, and it was only afterwards that I would imagine in my mind all the words I would have thrown back at the waiters. Another that still baffles me to this day is the amount of, for lack of a better word, respect, that a white person enjoys in this country and what they get away with simply because they are white. ” a lady at the counter of the immigration office in Mombasa asked me. “I have never been married to an African.” “But you watched your father.I was there to renew my passport and she was going through the bit on the form on spouse details. “But how does it compare to being married to an African? You can compare,” she said, as if I’m married to my father.We spent our first two years of married life, 20, in England.

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